I Had To Laugh

My grandpa always told the best stories. And you would know you were going to get one of these stories if you heard the phrases, 'I had to laugh,' or 'I find it ironic,' or 'when I was a boy'. Family gatherings consisted of his stories, along with the stories of my aunts, uncles, and cousins. There was never a soul that didn't laugh. Everyone needs funny stories like that every once and awhile. So I thought I'd share my favorite stories from my family with all of you who read this blog.  Sometimes, you just need to giggle at something someone else did for a change. 

1. Falling Solo

At my grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary back in 2006, I was asked to sing a solo. We practiced for months and I was completely prepared. I sang my song, everyone clapped, and as I crouched down to pick up the lyrics paper a few minutes later, my skirt accidentally caught underneath my shoe.  You can imagine my mortification when I stood up, and the skirt hit the floor. A small group of elderly couples attempted to stifle their giggles. Nothing says 'Congrats, you've made it to 50 years with the love of your life' than your granddaughter accidentally flashing the crowd. 

2. Not All Bars Are For Ballerinas

I have always loved to sing in the bathroom. Almost everyday I would grab my CD case (because there were no iPods when I was 8), CD player, and I would lock myself in the hall bathroom, belting out music and pretending to be a performer. One day in my safe haven, I lifted my leg up on the towel rack to pretend I was a ballerina, and I'll be darned if the rack didn't rip out of the wall. After that, Dad installed a sliding door in our shower instead of a curtain. The door came with a much sturdier towel rack. I was banned from being a ballerina. 

3. The Story of Smelly Brown

Once a month my Dad and his family would have people come over to check on them and see how they were doing. They'd sit in my grandparents front room and talk for hours. In my family, talking is something we quite enjoy. So when the conversation would start to drag for Dad's little attention span, he would excuse himself and walk to the bathroom a few feet away. Of course from the picture above you can tell exactly where this one is headed. In a strangled voice, Dad would start to say "Smelly Brown....Smelly Brown is in the toilet." the conversation outside would halt. Then Dad would flush the toilet and start shouting, "Smelly Brown is drowning! Smelly Brown is drowning!" along with gurgles and other hilarious noise associated with a flush (I actually am making this shirt for my Dad for his birthday this year). 

4. Bathroom Skateboarding

About 5 years after we moved in our house, my brother got a skateboard for his birthday. We weren't anywhere near balanced, so we would practice riding on our bellies down the driveway. Unfortunately the weather that day didn't wish to cooperate with our fun, so we went into our parents bathroom and starting sliding back and forth across the floor. Chris, being stubborn as always, refused to give me a turn. So when he decided to stand on the board and move forward, I kicked at it so hard the board flew out from under his feet and went through the bathroom wall into the living room. You can bet your bottom dollar I left him there to take the heat. What are big sisters for, right? 

5. From the Mouths of Babes

During my toddler years I spent a great deal of time with my grandma. One day Dad was driving us to her house, when he was cut off by another idiot driver. Very vulgar things came out of his mouth. Don't pretend you haven't done it either. I have. Of course Dad didn't notice I heard. He drove off thinking nothing of it. That was, until a few hours later when he received a call from my grandma, asking what sort of things my parents were teaching me. Apparently I had been walking around repeating everything Dad said in the car. After that we started getting our teeth brushed with dish soap.